Pema Chodron again, like last week. I so value her teaching. When I was at a very low point, living in Sucktown and seriously depressed, hoping every night that I would not wake up in the morning and being angry and upset when I did, it was her teaching that started to help me out of it. I was working at the local library at the time and I would check out audiobook CDs by her. As I lay in bed crying, I would listen and she provided me with things to think about without getting up and while still crying. Eventually, I stopped crying and I got up. I was healing. I climbed out of the pit of despair. I continue to be grateful for the access I have to her and other Buddhist teaching/psychology. I hope I never feel like that again. I find secular Buddhist thought/teaching to be very commonsensical. This quote makes perfect sense and as so often happens, I read it and think, 'Exactly!' Sometimes, though, I need a reminder.
'Let your curiosity be greater than your fear.'
And here's one from a different direction:
'When you feel in your gut what you are and then dynamically pursue it—don't back down and don't give up—then you're going to mystify a lot of folks.'
—Bob Dylan
6 comments:
She was originally from the US, but trained in the Tibetan Buddhist tradition. She's very practical and down-to-earth.
So pleased to read that reading Pema Chodron helped you ...
All the best Jan
I am sorry you suffer depression, and so strong. Just pleased never fall for medication. Blogger Ella stopped blogging in March after she got the same stupid meds I got. All they do is make you tired, but the mind still races. I got one last e-mail and never heard anything ever since.
Good you have those authors and teaching - best wishes from here, and a virtual hug.
Depression is huge...
Thanks, Jan! I was and am grateful. :-)
Thanks, Iris! I won't ever go for meds to deal with depression. I am not making a value judgement with respect to others, but I know myself pretty well and I don't think it would be a good idea for me. I have read other people's experiences of them working well, so they must do for some people. I've never known anyone personally who has had a good experience though.
The time I posted about was 14 years ago and while I have had bouts of depression since, it's not been that bad. I think that I have better tools with which to deal with these episodes when they arise now--at least so far, although I know that can change. Anxiety is harder, but I'm working on it :-)
My doc stated half of Germany takes that medication. I do not believe her. And you are right, anxiety is worse. My hands start trembling then, not funny in a job interview (haha, these days thankfully only via phone, if at all!).
I was trained early in my childhood to be anxious and not let it show, so I'm pretty good about presenting a calm exterior. I can put on what I call my plastic face anytime I need to and no one knows what I'm really thinking/feeling behind the fake smile unless I choose to communicate it. It's exhausting though.
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